Saturday, July 31, 2010

Saturday #3's

On your journal or mine write 3 words that describes what's going on or how you feel.
My 3 words are....
Roses for Debbie

And as always, thanks for listening!

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Just A Thought

When a plane crashes , and a lot of people die, I always wonder what happens to their frequent flier miles.

And remember.....
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Earthquake Survival Tip

The safest place to be during an earthquake would be in a stationary store!

and remember....
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Monday, July 26, 2010

Only In My World

Where the wolves are silent and the moon howls!

And remember.....
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Saturday #3's

On your journal or mine write 3 words that describes whats going on or how you feel.
My 3 words are.....
Freakin' Blazing Hot!

And as always, thanks for listening!

Thursday, July 22, 2010

The Way I See It

Some say the glass is Half-empty, Some say It is Half-full.
I say the glass is to freakin' big!

And remember...
Laissez les bon temps rouler!

And as always, thanks for listening!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Just A Thought

Instead of having truck scales on the highway, I think they ought to get one of those guys from the carnival and let him guess the weights.

And remember...
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

In The News

A woman in Montana was severely injured this afternoon when she attempted to force-breast-feed a wolverine.

And remember...
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Monday, July 19, 2010

Life

Life is hard, After all it kills you!

And remember....
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Saturday 3's

On your journal or mine write 3 words that describes what's going on or how you feel.
My 3 words are...

Forgot Saturday 3's

And as always, thanks for listening!

Friday, July 16, 2010

Preamble To The Constitution Of The American Legion

For God and Countrywe associate ourselves together for thefollowing purposes:
To uphold and defend the Constitution of the United States of America;
To maintain Law and Order;
To foster and perpetuate a one hundred percent Americanism;
To preserve the memories and incidents of our associations in the Great Wars;
To inculcate a sense of individual obligation to the Community, State and Nation;
To combat the autocracy of both the classes and the masses;
To make right the Master of Might;
To promote Peace and Goodwill on earth;
To safeguard and transmit to posterity the principles of Justice, Freedom and Democracy;
To consecrate and sanctify our comradeship by our devotion to mutual helpfulness.
God Bless Us All!

And as always, thanks for listening!

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Watch Your Step

Do you ever reach the top of a staircase and think there's one more step? So you take one of those big, awkward steps that doesn't accomplish anything? And then you have to do it a few more times,so people will think it's something you do all the time."I do this all the time, Folks.It's the third stage of syphilis."

And remember...
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

For The Guys

Do you ever have to sneeze while your taking a piss?It's frightening. Deep down you're afraid you'll release all sorts of bodily fluids into your pants.What people don't realize is that it is physically impossible to sneeze while pissing; your brain won't allow it.Because your brain knows you might blow your asshole out,and wind up having to repaint the entire apartment.

And remember.....
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always,thanks for listening!

Monday, July 12, 2010

All Hell Breaking Loose

I never worry that all hell will break loose.My concern is that only part of hell will break loose and be much harder to detect.

And remember.....
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Makes Me Feel Good

Isn't it a good feeling when you read the tabloids and realize that a lot of famous people are just as fucked up as you are?

And remember....
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Play Ball

When the convention of testical transplant surgeons had its annual softball game,they asked me to throw out the first ball.

And remember...
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Makes No Sense To Me

We use the sun to make electricity,and then we use electricity to operate sun lamps and tanning machines.

And remember...
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always , Thanks for listening!

Monday, July 5, 2010

Order For Table 9 Is Up ,Now Hop To It!

In restaurants where they serve frog's legs,what do they do with the rest of the frog?Do they just throw it away?You never see "frog torsos" on the menu. Is there actually a garbage can full of frog bodies in the alley?I wouldn't want to be a homeless guy looking for an unfinished cheese burger and open the lid on that!

And remember...
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Just Wondering

Is it illegal to charge admission to a free for all?

And Remember....
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Hygiene

I didn't wash today.If I'm not dirty,I don't wash.Some weeks I don't have to shower at all.I just groom my 3 basic areas : teeth, hair, and asshole.And to save time ,I use the same brush!

And remember....
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!

Friday, July 2, 2010

I Gots To Know

Can placebos cause side effects?
If so,are the side effects real?

And remember.....
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
And as always, thanks for listening!